
Modesty Standards were something I was blessed to be raised with. No, my dad wasn’t supper controlling. No, I was not raised to think that if I was scantily glad then it was my fault if something happened. I was raised to value myself and others enough to cover myself with dignity and reveal my beauty.
Can Guys Be Immodest?
Absolutely! Being shirtless when not appropriate, wearing to tight shirts or short/pants. Wearing short shorts, clothes with rude writing or images on them and constantly having their hand on their privates. I see it so much in our culture, but this is not about guys.
It’s Not About Guys
We do not dress modestly for guys. We dress modestly for our selves. A man does not have the excuse to think lustfully about a woman who is scantily dressed, nor does he have license to behave in any way less then gentlemanly towards her. However not everyman is a gentleman.
Modesty Is A Matter Of Etiquette
Dressing using modesty standards is a sign of respect to yourself and those around you. It takes into account how uncomfortable your father, brother, uncle or random good guy you are around, is when you wear a bikini or show a ton of cleavage.
Most women don’t wear immodest clothes trying to get sexual attention from men. Most women (and girls) wear immodest clothes because they think they are cute, it’s what everyone one is wearing, they don’t feel that anyone has a right to be offended/uncomfortable by what they are wearing (or lack ), or they just don’t know of an alternative.
Continually dressing in a way that does not take into account those around you is to put it bluntly, rude. Does this mean she is a (insert derogatory term for a woman here) because she does this? No. Just as it is rude for a woman to dress in a way that makes other people uncomfortable does not excuse our rudeness towards her.
Modesty = Classy
The ultimate way to be classy at all times it to be modest at all times. Note, modesty standards are different at different times. In our journey to be a classy lady we need to remember that how we dress and handle our selves reveals to the world how we see our selves and how we want to be seen.
What If I Mess Up My Modesty Standards?
We all fail modesty standards every now and then. There have been many times where I have worn something that I didn’t realize was see though, was too short, realized gapped too much at the neckline or didn’t stay put (nursing does not make this any easier).
Know that you will fail sometimes does not mean that we have license to not try. It simply means that we have grace on our selves and on those around us when wardrobe malfunctions happen or we see a woman who is exposing too much skin.
Do I Have To Look Frumpy, Old Or Like A 90s Homeschool Mom?
First of all I love 90s homeschool moms, my mom was one and so was my mother-in-law. However it was not the best time for conservative fashion, though I wonder what people will think about modest fashion in 30 year? We will get into specific modesty standards below but first is there middle ground between 90s homeschool mom and OnlyFans “model”?
There are many beautiful women who dress with such class that it is breath taking. Now my personal style is very vintage and vantage inspired so they woman I list will be along those lines. However most if you look I am sure you will find a few modest style icons in which ever fashion niche you prefer.
Modest Fashion Icons
Quick Note: The Ladies mentioned below will not always follow the modesty guidelines, however they have shown a track record of following them most of the time and being generally classy ladies in how they dress.
Princess Kate

Now this list would be remiss if it did not start with Princes Kate check out my Pinterest board of her style here. She is know for a simple, elegant, classic style. She shows that you can still dress beautifully even as you have children and get towards middle age.
Grace Kelley

I have not actually seen any of her movies but her style is so compelling.
Audrey Hepburn

An icon of timeless style (click here for my Pinterest board). Her quiet confidence really is center stage in everything she wears.
Jackie O
See her style here
Modesty Standards For Every Woman
Following these will help you remain classy and limit wardrobe failures. If you follow these two guidelines and a few rules you are all set.
Your clothes should be tight enough to show your a woman and loose enough to reveal your a lady.
Being modest does not mean being shapeless. In fact dressing in a way that makes it difficult to tell if you are a woman is immodest. God gave us these bodies we should embrace them but not flaunt them.
Your clothes should be modest for the environment you are in.
What is modest while you are in labor at home or at the hospital is vastly different from what is modest to wear to church which is different that what you wear to the beach.
- Necklines should never show cleavage or the roundness of your upper breasts.
- Necklines should never be lower than a full hand width below your collar bone.
- Hemlines should reach the top of the knee cap.
- Shorts should be at least finger tip long.
- Leggings are not pants.
- No outer garment should be skin tight.
- Undergarment should be just that, under your garment.
- Never wear heels so tall you can’t walk in them.
- Swimsuits should cover your midriff, buttocks, and breasts.
- Wear a bra.
- Wear shorts or legging under dresses and skirts to avoid thighs rubbing together and wardrobe malfunctions.
- Cover your shoulders in church or office environments,
- Make sure you top does not gap when you lean over.
- Cover your midriff.
- Do not wear to loose of shorts and put your legs up.
- Do not wear sheer items without either a slip or a tank top.
Remember, modesty is not about following a bunch of rules. It is an attitude that flows into what you choose to wear. Modesty standards are about not drawing undue attention to your self. Shine bright because of your beauty, modesty and wonderful personality not because your buttocks or breast are exposed.
Modest Alternatives To A Bikini
Though a bikini seems to the most common swimsuit it is certainly not the only option. My personal favorite is a rash guard of sorts (I prefer the more feminine options) and either athletic shorts or a tennis skirt.
I find that tennis skirts, tops and dresses work really well as swimsuits as the fabric dries quickly and is thick enough to not be see through when wet. Vintage style swimsuits can be great alternatives as well.
Hello Katelyn! My favorite modest clothing brand is Inherit Clothing Company. I don’t buy many new pieces of clothing, as I also enjoy resale shopping and making my own clothing, but when I’m in need of a new piece of clothing this is the first place that I look!